Our bed & breakfast building techniques

When we moved in and started building there was no electricity, no water, and the one mostly finished building was full of destroyed furniture and had a leaky roof. The property had been abandoned for five years after hurricane Georges destroyed the main house. As I have told many guests when giving them tours of the property, we filled five 30 yard dumpsters of garbage when cleaning up the hurricane damage. My immediate goal was to finish the villa and chalet so we would have rentals to have some income as soon as possible to help with the monthly home depot bills. Laurie's goal was to clean up the property and make everything look nice. You can guess which one of us does the accounting. We finished the chalet first and started renting it out that summer (2004) and had a few guests while we worked on getting the villa ready for the season which starts after Thanksgiving. To help keep us on our toes I had the first renters booked in the villa November 15th so if we didn't have it finished by then we would have had some explaining to do. It worked out that the day our first renters showed up Laurie was still sweeping sawdust out the front door as I was leading our new guests in the back door after checking them in. Now that we had two rentals completed and enough income to defray the constant Home Depot (we call it Home Despot) bills our next goal was somewhere for us to stay. The chalet was built over a large garage. We cleaned out the horse feed, tack and god-knows what else and I built a temporary kitchen on one side. The kitchen was fairly important as we bill our place as a bed and breakfast so Laurie needed somewhere to make the breakfast. In the wall dividing the new kitchen from the rest of the garage I put in pantry shelves. This temporary kitchen is the one we still use today and our guests comment (when seated on the long mahogany table) that the farm house style kitchen is so romantic. They don't know that if you open the dishwasher door all the way it may unbalance and fall over because I haven't installed it completely only just resting it on the packing pallet which it came in and hooking up the pipes and power. I installed the stove top in a mahogany cabinet that was part of my shipping agency office (very nautical) in the distant past and the oven is on blocks. The central work table we made from an antique examining table from a pediatrician. I finished it with a large cast iron sink mounted beside the dishwasher. On the other wall we have two large refrigerators, one a commercial unit recycled from Laurie's flower shop and the other a very nice two door well-known name brand "Elite" machine with an ice maker that is only capable of working 91 days or until the end of it's warrantee whichever comes first.

I think I better make a new paragraph. I didn't realize that describing our quant farm house kitchen would take so many sentences. The worst part, the embarrassing part, is the bedroom which Laurie and I slept in for the first year of operations. So our bedroom was behind the wall of pantry cabinets, basically on the other side of our quant farmhouse kitchen. There were several things about this location for a bedroom that were annoying:

1. Whenever the commercial refrigerator's compressor kicked-on you stopped being able to hear yourself think which would disturb my REM sleep patterns (Laurie was more annoyed by other things further down in this list but since I am writing this I will order the list with the things that most annoyed me first). The lesson to learn from this is that no matter how cool it is to have an expensive commercial refrigerator in your kitchen remember that the people who make the household units know a thing or two about what you might want in your home as opposed to your factory and being startled out a sound sleep by the jet-taking-off sound of a commercial refrigerator's compressor kicking off is not a selling point.

2. The bathroom we used was not very close to our bedroom. For our first year the only working bathroom was under a tarp in the north wing of the main house (which became the villa). Running through the rain on the slippery tile floor was hard to get used to. Sometimes we would get stuck inside waiting for a rain to subside. Remember that we live in the rainforest. Later I built a bathroom in the south wing (we call it the Anderson wing after the volunteer who did most of the masonry work). But access to that bathroom still involved walking through the kitchen and then across the south breezeway. We decided that having a bathroom adjoining your bedroom is not a luxury.

3. The roof over our heads was the floor to the upstairs. That is a convoluted way of saying we were living downstairs. I know that lots of people live downstairs but I never was a very good apartment dweller (witness the fact that I moved a mile into the heart of the rainforest) so I didn't suffer the pitter patter sound of feet upstairs very well. Sometimes in the middle of the night my imagination would take over and I would try to deduce what the sounds coming from upstairs were--perhaps heavy fishing boots and a game of musical chairs? I didn't know but I laid awake anyway.

4. Occasionally guests would ask us where on the property we lived. Our place is a rambling mansion of five houses in various stages of repair so a wave in almost any general direction usually dismissed this question but Laurie was never comfortable with it. We certainly weren't going to say: "Our bedroom is the squalid nine-by-nine room with the cement floor on the other side of the pantry."

Laurie just came in--interrupted this writing--to tell me the dishwasher fell over. She bought some new cutlery that is very heavy stainless steel and you really can't pull the drawer out all the way when it is loaded with that weight. She has already forgotten how bad our first couple of years were and wants me to mount the diswasher. Now that we live in the south "Anderson" wing of the house and have our own private bathroom and a front room with weight training equipment and all sorts of other luxuries but it is all in your expectations. Maybe if we had spent our first year staying in the stable down below with a straw floor and a mud path to an outhouse, maybe then the dishwasher falling over wouldn't be so serious.

Laurie and I still have conflicting goals. I want to finish the jungle suite (it has a huge bedroom high in the tree tops with tree ferns and epiphytes at eye level). I want more rentals available for next season. Laurie wants me to finish repairing the swimming pool (like that isn't a hole for throwing money in) and she spends hours working on the grounds tying orchids to trees and planting heliconia. The rainforest is so prolific that, lucky for me, she just concentrates on the paths between the buildings and the yard in front and is willing to let the rest of the acreage be wild. Sometimes she will be working on the grounds and forget about everything else, like dinner...

Complaints from our rainforest bed and breakfast

Living in the El Yunque rainforest is wonderful.

The sounds of the coquis or the call of the Puerto Rican screech owl (straight out of a Tarzan movie soundtrack) make every evening relaxing and special. We are so high in the rainforest that these wild sounds are the only ones to break the perfect silence.

There are some, not so wonderful, things that we have to put up with living so high in the rainforest. We have a nice library of books. Including those expensive computer reference books as well as novels and many, many, books about carpentry, masonry, wiring your house, decorating, building a septic tank--the books we need for all the work we do here renovating the inn. I like to sit down and enjoy reading a novel but living in the rainforest sometimes the words are missing. Not all the words, just a few select ones that the termites found the most tasty. Once or twice a year the termites up here swarm and when they do they dive into everything including our books and boring in one side and out the other eating a word or two out of every page--only the words they find interesting. There is no defense for them as we are the visitors in their rainforest home.

https://www.ppdl.purdue.edu/PPDL/images/termiteswarm3.jpg

https://www.ppdl.purdue.edu/PPDL/images/termiteswarm3.jpg

We also have a CD collection and a DVD collection. iTunes saved our CD collection. After about a year the aluminum that is sandwiched in the mylar of the CD's develops a corrosion that looks like worm tracks and the CD is unusable. I thought CDs were supposed to be industructable compared to vinyl records but not up here. We added every CD that was still good to our iTunes database and we keep that 500 gig hardrive backed up to another hard drive (no point in burning the data to CDs or DVDs to back it up as those back ups will just fail with the same problem).

Technology has just recently come to our rescue for the DVDs too. There is a wonderful device called a media gate (made in Korea) which we use to watch our movies and TV shows. It has S-video as well as a USB port and an Ether net port. We load all our movies and TV shows into its hard disk (either Divex or MP4) and it plays them like magic. It even comes with a little remote and the sound out is a fiber optic cable that connects to our speakers. The only problem is the time it takes to convert DVD's to Divex that we can save on the hard drive. Of course buying huge hard drives to store all the movies is expensive too but not as expensive as buying DVD's and finding out a year later that they are corroded and unplayable.

The new products from the iTunes store are nice too. We have a little microwave dish pointed at the antennas which are on the peak of El Yunque (and only a mile or so from our house). This dish feeds to our network giving us internet access better than a T1 line which we send out to WIFI for the whole property.

I am describing all this technical stuff because it is kind of ironic. The high tech devices like CD's and DVD's don't work up here but the even more high tech devices like WIFI and our media gate player work great. We do a few things differently with our electronics though. We leave computers and WIFI nodes etc on all the time so that the internal heat keeps the high humidity from corroding the circuits. We also have pretty good UPS systems to protect us from the occasional losses of power during a tropical storm. I built it using a large sine wave converter (from a ship) and marine batteries.

In one of the next blogs I will describe our attempts to get even more off the grid.

Bill

Living in the rainforest while building a bed & breakfast

Subtitle: And while also renting out to guests.

I want this blog to be interesting but I'm operating under a lot of constraints. The biggest one is who might be reading this? There's a chance my wife Laurie might read this, especially since I depend on her editing skills and suggestions. So the pathos and ennui and character development which comes from hearing about relationship struggles will have to be left out (sorry, I hope you keep reading). Then there is my friends and family. Some of them might read this (although probably not all the way through) so I can't talk about the stuff (or link to it) that I learned reading someone's myspace blog (which sucks because we would both increase our hits with a cross-promotion and I want to increase my readership and they have to let more people find out about all that personal stuff someday). And the friends who might read this preclude lots of other interesting stories (especially when they are about friends or relatives or guests). It is just impossible to put any gossip at all in one of these blogs...

Am I using too many parentheses? Are asking rhetorical questions, which I will never answer later in this dialogue bad grammatically? Sure sounds weird. I warned about my grammer in the blurb I wrote about myself. This shouldn't really be a new paragraph either because I am still trying to hammer out what I can write about.

The other constraint, and a fairly important one, is the potential guests who might read this blog and since that is one of the purposes of this blog (all the earlier mentioned constraints stop this blog from being one of those cool get-your-suicidal-thoughts-out-there blogs) this could be a real showstopper if I let it. Most of the guests we have had have been fairly literate. In fact they run toward scientists, doctors and educators. Which means that two-thirds of my guests are literate. So I have to be careful what I say about the Rainforest Inn, about Puerto Rico, about El Yunque, about politics, religion, shit what am I going to talk about?

1. Cool things to do in Puerto Rico?

No, already do that with the podcast Laurie and I do.

2. What it is like rennovating a family home to make it into a bed in breakfast?

Ok, I will go into some of that. Today I am building shelves in our laundry room. The laundry room is in the same building as the villa. It is in one corner off the breezeway. September is our slowest month. In fact there are two weeks in September when we have no guests at all. Since we can't do any work while guests are here (guests that might be reading this please look the other way) then we have to work madly when they're not here. That is why sometimes when we're dining with guests enjoying my wife's gourmet breakfasts and talking about things to do while staying at the rainforest inn I usually suggest things to do that involve not being here relaxing and reading a book, or lazing in one of our hammocks, or bird-watching from the back porch. Instead I suggest going on a hike far far into the rainforest so that we can pound a few nails without disturbing anyone. Now I better get back to installing those shelves.